If all goes well, you’ll be seeing a new author here on the Roundtable at some point this weekend.
His name is Trey Killian. Here’s a little bit about him.
Trey is a 4th generation hockey writer. His great grandfather, Patrick O’Guinness wrote for the now defunct Montreal Star newspaper, covering the Canadiens for many many years. He was named by the Canadian Press as the best hockey beat writer of the first half of the 20th Century. An Irishman in Montreal wasn’t the easiest thing to be, but O’Guinness had the power of prose, and on most nights, already had his story written before the end of the third period — with quotes from the Head Coach already added. See, he knew exactly what the coach would say. He was THAT good.
Trey’s grandfather, Peter “Pow Pow” Killian, was also a hockey writer. He is credited with inventing the cliche of “put the biscuit in the basket,” and was the first writer to report an injury as an “upper body injury”.
Trey’s father, Bob Killian, wrote for three seasons, but then found a job that actually paid decent money, so he took that. But he was supportive of Trey following his dream of one day being a big-time hockey writer.
And look at Trey now. He’s made the big-time. The Admirals Roundtable. He’ll be the first 4th generation hockey writer in the history of the world when he makes his Roundtable debut this weekend.
So please, welcome the newest member of the Roundtable writing staff, Mr. Trey Killian.
And now, the transcript of a completely made-up press conference.
Ryan: Alright, this fake press conference is now UNDER THERE! Dave Boehler, you get the honor of the first question.
Dave Boehler: Hi Trey…Dave Boehler, Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. Maybe you’ve heard of me. I’m kind of a big deal. What made you want to join the Roundtable?
Trey Killian: Hi Dave. Truthfully, I just wanted to be part of a winning team, and help the team any way I can. Plus, I love Mountain Fury, so I figured this would be a perfect match.
Sutty: ’Sup bro. Have you been briefed about what kind of hazing is involved with the job? You’re the new guy….there really isn’t any way around it.
Trey Killian: ’Sup. Yeah, I’ve heard it involves Beef-a-roo. I’m okay with that. I think.
ManInTheBox: So, you think you can just come in here and start writing? Just like that? How do we know that we can trust you?
Trey Killian: I don’t like Sidney Crosby.
ManInTheBox: Good enough for me. You can stay.
Aaron Sims: Trey, have you become a fan of Chili Sabotage on Facebook yet? They’re kind of a big deal too.
Trey Killian: Not yet, but it’ll be the first thing I do when I get home.
OUCH!: Do you have strong feelings about the dump-and-chase style of play?
Trey Killian: Depends on the personnel. It’s not the most exciting hockey to watch.
Dave Boehler: Will you do one of the day-in-the-life articles or 20-questions posts for my blog over at JSOnline?
Trey Killian: Sure, if you want. But I’m not here to make a scene. Just to write about the sport I love. That’s all. I had an Eggo for breakfast today. I’m pretty sure your readers wouldn’t care.
Creedfeed: Are you up on all the lingo? Are you ready to Fury The Fury?
Trey Killian: Fake sponsorships are the best. I fury the fury in everyday life, so I don’t think there will be a problem.
Dave Boehler: Pow-Pow Killian……Ryan just made that up, didn’t he?
Trey Killian: Dave, do you really need to ask that?
Ryan: We’ll take one more question for Mr. Killian. (pause). Anybody? (crickets chirping) Anybody? Come on Dave, through him a softball question for him to hit out of the park.
Dave Boehler: Actually, a question for you, Ryan. Why did you feel the need to write this fluff piece today?
Ryan: To lighten the mood around here a bit. It’s been pretty dour in these parts lately. And to introduce Trey, who is going to be a great addition to the staff going forward.